"Snooki!?"

Um.

President Obama appeared on “The View” this morning…

Which depresses the fuck out of me…

Look, I love me some Barack, but I just don’t get it…

Maybe it’s just that I think “The View” sucks so badly…

I’d prefer he made a guest appearance on “Yo Gabba Gabba!“…

Am I the only one?

Check it out:

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Zach Galif^absudk**nfd+sfdgkf_jdbgskis

I’m not sure why I’m stalking Funny or Die lately…

But, I’m relatively positive that if Funny or Die had a penis (even a tiny, baby carrot penis), it’d be perfect.

Please watch Michael Cera guest star on Zach Galifianakis’ show “Between Two Ferns”…

It’s brilliant.

Also, don’t ever, ever try to spell Zach Galifianakis’ last name because it’ll make your eyes bleed…

If you don’t have a lot of time, please just watch from around 2:20…

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Yes, please.

Um…

Every once in a while, a company comes along that is just so totally right on and amazingly chic that it deserves its own post.  No, really.

I’m in love with Green with Glamour…

Straight up.

Apparently, so is Bones star, Emily Deschanel (sister of Zooey Deschanel)…

Honestly, it’s Eco-Chic and totally brilliant.

In fact, I challenge you to name one other site that will dress and accessorize you impeccably, decorate your digs, save the earth, and restore your karma in one fell swoop!

I love these girls and so will you!

Check out Green with Glamour online immediately and remain one of my friends.

*** Eh-hem. Incidentally, if any of you are of the mind to purchase me a gift, PURE by Ami McKay’s Cyrilla Daybed in Charcoal would be a dream come true.

xo

The End.

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YES!

Whoah, this is pretty awesome!

Constance Mc Millen, the girl who sued her Mississippi school district over its ban of same-sex prom dates has accepted an offer to settle her suit!

American Civil Liberties Union attorneys representing Constance have filed notice in U.S. District Court to accept a judgment offer from the Itawamba County School District to pay $35,000, plus attorney’s fees.

Okay!?

As part of the agreement, the school district says it will follow a policy not to discriminate based on sexual orientation and gender identity in any educational or extracurricular activities.

The ACLU says the case is also precedent-setting because the district is the first of its kind in Mississippi to ever implement a policy banning discrimination and harassment on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity.

Nice job, Constance…

Honey, you go ahead and throw your own fantastic $35K lesbian prom!

In the meantime, I’ll be in touch with the ACLU to see if it’s possible to sue my high school for forcibly implanting in my head that “Tevas” were acceptable footwear…

I’ll forgive, but I’ll never forget…

The End.

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"Nuh huh huh bee bop boo!"

Um.

Obviously, as a prominent, glittering member of the homosexual community, I’m perpetually shooting diamond-encrusted spitballs at homophobic bigots…

On the other hand, there’s a moment when someone’s unimaginable stupidity melds with their inordinate craziness to form an unstoppable critical mass of pure, Grade-A terd, that always seems to hit me right in the funny-bone…

So is the case with people who speak in tongues…

Please watch this video of some fucking idiot pastor in Rhode Island, whose got a whole lot of “Brrrrapuh Puh Puh Gala Baba Nanana” to share with you…

I like how this dude thinks he’s helping the cause against Gay Marriage…

Enjoy:

(Via OMG! Blog)

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HOT... I don't care that he's an idiot...I don't...

Here’s how I feel…

You might not like Kathy Griffin but, holy shit is she funny… and where the hell did HER BODY come from!?

Obviously, it came from a plastic surgeon, but it’s still pretty impressive.

If you don’t like Kathy, I don’t think that we share the same SENSE OF HUMOR… and in that case, I mean, I’m not quite sure why we’re doing spending all of this time together, you know?

So maybe we’re not friends anymore?

Let’s sleep on it…

While we’re sleeping on it, please watch the video that prompted the father of my 19 children, openly-gay Massachusetts representative Barney Frank, to issue this scathing statement to Ms. Griffin:

“Having agreed to go on your show, I was particularly disappointed in the terrible comment you made about Sen. Scott Brown’s daughters. I think it’s possible to have fun, and even to poke fun at people in my business, without this kind of completely unfair attack.

And while I don’t usually feel compelled to comment on what various entertainers so, since you did include me in that show I wanted to make it very clear that I thought what you did was wholly unfair and inappropriate. It’s the kind of thing that makes it less likely that I or others can cooperate with you in the future.”

Yipes!

Check it out:

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Felicidades Dan y Gael!

Oh!

So, Argentina has become the first (super fucking hot) Latin American country to legalize same-sex marriage!

After a 14 hour debate that ended last night, the Senate passed the bill that gives gay and lesbian couples the equal right to marry and adopt children!

This is awesome for several reasons…

Mostly because, being told that I can marry a hot-ass Argentine dude, is like hearing that from now on, I’ll have to trade in any shitty car I ever drive, because it’s illegal for me not have a Ferrari…

Forever…

A Ferrari with light eyes, a hot accent, and an ass you can bounce an Argentine Peso off…

The End.

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Wow...

Oh, here’s a batshit, racist billboard that went up someplace in Iowa…

As you can see, it depicts President Obama pitted between Hitler and Lenin…

I think someone decided to go cover this embarrassing offensive shit up this afternoon, before Iowa (as a state) rolled over and died of stupidity by association…

On the other hand, god knows that I love me a hot, sizzling barrel-full of “crazy” at all times…

And, honestly, nobody brings the mixed nut-bag like the Tea Partiers…

So, to level off the above billboard, I decided to share with you one of my favorite Tea Party videos…

For extra fun, listen carefully after the crazy dude’s siege seems to have ended and someone else screams “Joe McCarthy!”, immediately followed by some other dolt howling “Well, he was right!”…

No, guys…

Duh.

“Andrew McCarthy” was right…

Enjoy:

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Finally!

YES!

I’ve always wanted to combine my two favorite things; Gossip and Shopping…

Finally, there’s a way to get your celeb fix, then browse the deliciousness of our online store, then come on back for more gossip!

We just got a huge shipment of amazing stuff from Valentino, Tory Burch, and Missoni!

Not to mention our exclusive pre-sale of Ruthie Davis’ limited edition handbag!

We’ll be uploading them as soon as we can, so keep coming back for more!

Click here to check it out!

XO!

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So what?

Another thing that I heard people talking about this morning (in the subway) was how Al Gore probably tried to cajole some weirdo masseuse into giving him a handjob…

Which seems weird because, although I’ve only had about a dozen massages in my life, every single one of my “body technicians” tried to pull my trigger…

Every single one.

Anyhoo…

Apparently (and I’m just guessing here, because I never read the article that accompanied the above photo), she also has some sort of bodily fluid stain on her pants from Al…

I mean, this is sort of hard to believe…

On the other hand, this revelation comes only a month after Al and Tipper announced their divorce, after 40 years of marriage…

Which is fishy…

I don’t know, I’ve always adored Al Gore, and am in awe of his work to bring awareness to global warming…

Oh, also, one time I knew this guy who was a Congressional intern who was allowed to use the health and workout facilities available to Congress, and he told me that Al Gore’s penis is the size of a COOKIE-TUBE…

No wonder that masseuse has such a screwed up look on her face…

The End.

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