Au naturale...

Um.

What’s nice is that after I finish this story, I can dry it in the sun and use it to grow strawberries in my window box…

In an interview with Britain’s You Magazine, Daryl Hannah says that she has lost roles in films due to the fact that her reputation has been maligned by rumors of cosmetic surgery…

When in reality, she looks like a fucking nutball wax-face, just because:

“There are so many people in LA who have had cosmetic surgery and they all look like Muppets she says, firmly. There was a picture taken a while ago of me emerging from the ocean, with my hair slicked back and no make-up on. I looked as though I had puffy, squinty eyes and the rumor went round I’d had work done; I lost jobs because of it and I thought about suing, but in the States you have to prove malicious intent.

I’ve got a little jowly, and sometimes I look in the mirror and think, ‘Oh my God’, but I am too much of a coward to go under a surgeon’s knife for something that wasn’t life-saving. I’ve had knee and elbow operations, and I’ve broken my back three times, riding and performing movie stunts, and that gives you an appreciation of your body. I lost the top of my finger playing on my grandma’s mobility stair lift. It was terrifying, but could have been so much worse – and it has bestowed on me an ability to be a more compassionate person.”

Perfect.

Incidentally, HERE’S A PHOTO of Daryl about 25 years ago…

Now she looks like THIS… and she’s 106 years old…

So, you do the math.

No, really…

You do it because my SUPERCOMPUTER self destructed when it tried to load a high resolution photo of Daryl’s grumpy collagen face and, in turn, crossed its eyes, shit its pants, and finally imploded.

The End.

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