"I vant to fuck your penis...uh-blah, uh-blah, uh-blah..."
I know!
Men all over the greater West Hollywood area are now furiously fanning out steam rooms and checking their penises for twin puncture wounds…
Either way, remember how some dude put a photo of Nicolas Cage on eBay for $1 million, claiming it was proof that he’s a vampire who fought in the Civil War?
Well, guess what?
That same person has unearthed a similar photo that proves John Travolta is also an undead Yankee…
I know.
That photo is frighteningly accurate, which really makes me wonder about a lot of things…
Firstly, it makes me really question the human race’s place in this world, you know?
I mean, it seems really species-centric to think that a spirit world with creatures and implications beyond our understanding doesn’t exist, right?
I know…
It also makes wonder why this story seems infinitely more believable than the one about John Travolta being heterosexual.
The End.
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Tags: John Travolta, Nicolas Cage
